As a data analyst and lifelong football fan, I've seen my fair share of fan debates, but the current state of Real Madrid's online community is something else. What used to be civil discussions about tactics and transfers has devolved into constant infighting between player fanbases - from Vinícius vs Bellingham stans to the recent influx of Mbappé supporters. With poor results amplifying tensions and trolls joining the fray, even veteran moderators are struggling to keep order. This article examines how player worship is fracturing one of football's most storied fanbases through my analytical lens as a sports statistician.